What's Up Africa, Billionaire Fever, Sierra Leone Style Theo Edwards What's Up Africa, Billionaire Fever, Sierra Leone Style Theo Edwards

Freetown and The Billionaires in Leones: A Comedy of Cash

If you’ve ever dreamed of being a billionaire, skip Silicon Valley or Dubai—just land in Freetown with a wallet full of Sierra Leonean leones (SLL /NLe). Welcome to the Land of Paper Fortunes.

Forget Elon Musk and his rocket—real billionaires are in Freetown, pushing wheelbarrows full of Leones just to buy soap. Here, the title Billionaire isn’t about private islands and hedge funds. It’s about how many rubber bands you own to tie up your money stacks.

Thanks to hyperinflation, you too can walk around with stacks of notes so tall they double as a pillow.

Being a Leone billionaire is like being given a Monopoly set and told that you're the richest person in the world. While your wallet may be full, your stomach might not be.

What's wrong with Africa in general, despite having abundant reserves of valuable commodities?

Welcome to the Land of Paper Fortunes! If you’ve ever dreamed of being a billionaire, skip Silicon Valley or Dubai—just land in Freetown with a wallet full of Sierra Leonean leones (SLL /NLe).

Forget Elon Musk and his rocket—real billionaires are in Freetown, pushing wheelbarrows full of Leones just to buy soap. Here, the title Billionaire isn’t about private islands and hedge funds. It’s about how many rubber bands you own to tie up your money stacks.

Thanks to hyperinflation, you too can walk around with stacks of notes so tall they double as a pillow. The Sierra Leonean Leone has had a troubled past, with inflation hammering its value daily and relegating it to the lower tiers of the global economy. To put it bluntly, one billion leones will not even buy you a mid-range ‘Kekus.’

 
A Mid-range Kekus
 

Being a Leone billionaire is like being given a Monopoly set and told that you're the richest person in the world. While your wallet may be full, your stomach might not be.

A Currency Safari

It’s insane what has happened with Africa's currency in general, despite having the world's largest physical Gold reserves and abundant, valuable commodities on the continent.

GHS 40,000. Looks calm in Ghana

This is GHS 40,000. Looks calm in Ghana— But cross into Nigeria and it swells to 4.9 million Naira— suddenly you need a ‘Ghana Must Go’ bag to carry the bundles.

Not done! Jump to Uganda and it explodes into 11.5 million Uganda Shillings— forget backpack, you’re loading the notes into a pick-up truck like cement bags.

Then there’s the Leones currency: SLL | NLe. Well, will somebody please help: Forget duffels, forget trucks…

Behold, the land where one billion makes you rich on paper, but in real life, you’re still hustling for small change at Lumley Beach.

Forget push‑ups; billionaires here get biceps from hauling their notes. One trip to the market looks like you’re moving house. You don’t even carry a wallet—you bring a rice sack. Every purchase is cardio: counting out several hundred thousand just to buy mangoes while the seller looks bored halfway through.

ATMs spit out bills so rapidly you feel like you’ve won a money‑blowing game show—except the prize is worth a microwaved meat pie at the Crown Bakery on Wilberforce Street.

The Billionaire Lifestyle Siaka Stevens Edition: The Billionaire Capital Nobody Asked For

During my time at SLET, back in the days, and for a long time, you could exchange $1 (one dollar) for a few cents. And that is not even equivalent to one Leone.

What has happened to Sierra Leone's currency is insane. Being a billionaire comes with no limousines, only lorries of cash. Dinner reservations don’t involve caviar—they involve a bag of rice surviving the month. The true laughter comes from the kids, who watch their uncle boast of billions while drinking warm water. Snicked one six-year-old “uncle has billions, but no cold water in the fridge, for there is no electricity.”

Carrying around millions in Leones offers a unique workout routine. You don’t need weight when you’re lugging bundles of cash. Imagine! In the end, Leone billionaire’s life is less Picasso, more tragedy-comedy. You flaunt notes so tall they resemble manuscripts, only to trade them away for bread that tastes like betrayal.

A billion leones might stock your pantry with rice, palm oil, fish, and the occasional imported snack. Forget lobster—it’s more Maggi cubes and evaporated milk. This is not wealth, it’s cosplay wealth with no exit. A Monopoly board on steroids. A billionaire bubble that bursts the moment you try to price something. Anything!

In a nation where everyone dreams of striking it big, the true billionaires are the ones selling the tools. The rubber bands, sacks, and calculators. They are the Jeff Bezoses of every street corner.

The government insists things will stabilize, ‘Paopa, ’ ‘Trust the process, ’ it’s the only real flex left. In the meantime, the true value isn’t in the billions you carry—it’s in how many bags of rice and afternoons of generator fuel you can afford before your stack wilts under the heat of the next inflation.

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